I wrote this poem today and I think you’ll appreciate it. It is in response to @Peter d'Errico ‘s piece on thinking like a lawyer. Curious your theology background - is it more Vedic or Christian/Catholic or other? I was born in a Sufi commune, moved to the greater Boston area to train for skating (briefly stopped by Connecticut where my mother saved me from someone who tried to groom me who later settled with several other skaters, then went to an anabaptist college, married my youth sponsor from an evangelical free church who was scary messed up, heard God speak for the first time telling me to move back to Boston, which I had said I would do over my dead body kicking and screaming, and met my current husband in the church I felt guided to while seven months pregnant with my oldest daughter. My now husband and I got kicked off the worship team, but I still did some time in seminary before realizing it was pretty dead in there.
The silliness of law
Is that it just depends
On which paw
You place on which
Jot or tittle
Of if you use your paws to prance around
A little
If a dog picked up little pieces of paper
That represented which precedents would become vapor
Or chose which Supreme Court Cases to take
Rather than avoiding those with a certain high stake
That could undermine the
Power of the Dominator
To take
Well if a dog used his smell
To find what stinks
And to bring justice back from the brink
We just might find a different story
Whether or about rights of protestors
Or truly horrible finks
Who do fathomless atrocities beyond what the mind can absorb, what it thinks
Awww Alicia, this is so good. I need to take it in and come back and respond when I can absorb. The words are powerful. I’m gonna come back to this. Thank you so much. Hello.🌹❤️🐉
Alicia, yes, all of my formal education was untoward anything I thought it would be. But I guess I needed to do that to find that out.
both Christian theology, mostly mysticism found very enriching and then Advaita mixed up in the world of male sages with many women holding them up.
Don’t get me going. My children’s father one of them., need I say they are without fathering As the Vedic expression is of the opinion that you do not exist. The world is Brahman, Brahman alone is real…
Ooooo - I would love to hear more about the Christian mysticism you have found resonant! That sucks about the gurus. And the misuse of non dualism. What the f, right? I have a copy of Yeshe Tsogyal's terma autobiography and in it Padma clearly considers her an equal. I once went on a medicine buddha retreat that actually was given by a woman who claims enlightenment in the Tibetan tradition who switched bodies using a secret scroll because she/formerly he didn't agree with the sexism in Buddhism. I asked one of the nuns why Green Tara wasn't bigger compared to Shakyamuni Buddha and she told me, "Well it is buddhism." I said, "Yeah, but it's not Shakyamuni-ism." I get weird awkward silence! In the Yeshe Tsogyal autobiography Padma says someday tantra/secret mantra will get abused and become unhelpful. The woman guru (not my guru) said she wasn't sure if sexuality was more helpful or unhelpful at this point because so many people have trauma. I stay away from gurus, generally, and new age communities but I have a bit of a nose for bad gurus and it is my strong tendency to call them out. In fact one of my New Year's resolutions this year is to stop bopping people over the head every time they post a quote a by someone famous I know to have a dark side that is carried (and I believe transmitted) informationally within their appealing quote, unless I am truly led to do so.
Thank you for this very necessary and dear reminder of who we are and who we can choose to be under our own power. I don’t need to be a woman in a man’s world. I can embrace being a woman in my own world. With all the fierce love and endless curiosity this vessel will hold. Appreciate the beauty and power of your writing so much. ❤️
Awww, yes yes yes, I love the strength and your response to this essay. I feel empowered by your words and appreciate you so much. The old man’s world is crumbling as it needs to. I love finding the stories of women. Thanks for commenting.
Thank you, Wendy, I heard an interview with Tori Amos recently, which got me to listen more to her music. It’s been years. My daughters used to always tease me about singing her songs “the color of orange knickers under your Petty coat…”
I’m curious as to what you will think about the documentary, I am woman. It was an eye-opener for me of course it doesn’t cover all of her life but very interesting to see the challenges she traversed.
Hello Shelley, thank you so much for reading and commenting. I feel like I received strength in writing this. There is so much that women have done. I went down a rabbit hole and I could’ve written an entire book and then some.
I know the crawling feeling. I’m so glad you’re here.
Hi Prajna, I really enjoyed your powerful words. I am currently working through Murdock's The Heroine's Journey", it's excellent. Sending love and power to you x
A truly magnificent and important post. (Also I received a little nudge from the universe with a few synchronicities I’ve had lately with Tori Amos, someone I haven’t thought about in years.) I loved hearing your mom’s story most of all. But thank you for this beautiful tribute to Helen Reddy. I have to go watch that documentary now! I do think the idea of woman is evolving and thank Goddess for that. We have a long way to go. Essays like this give us the hope we need to press on. An extraordinary gift.
I didn’t know all of those things about Tori Amos. We are listening to one of our songs in the kitchen and I decided to do some more research. I didn’t even know she was part Cherokee then I remembered you with her not that long ago. I learned all kinds of things she’s epic.
My mother was a true inspiration for her time and situation, without a doubt. Thank you for recognizing that part of the essay.
And Helen Reddy seems like she was born ready.
Thanks so much for liking and sharing and commenting. I appreciate you.
In 1973, I came of age. Roe Vs Wade was now considered “settled law,” but not really law, more like a ruling by which the country would abide. Why it was never codified as law is what got us here today. In 1974, I was “allowed” to get my first credit card. Up until that time, women had to have the signature of a husband or male relative in order to get credit of any kind. In the mid-seventies, it became illegal for a landlord to discriminate against a woman raising a child on her own, by refusing to rent to them. The seventies were a heady time for women, who in entering the work-force in increasing numbers, breathed in a notion of independence, and identity not formed or informed by men. Still, in the 1970’s the phrase “date rape” had not yet entered the lexicon, and women were often abused in this way without much recourse. Always lurking in the shadows has been a dark mysogeny meant to hurt, harm and keep women down. Helen Reddy, heroine that she is, brought awareness to the struggle to be seen as a free and sovereign soul, but the progress of such has never been completely transformative to our gender as a whole.
Again, we find ourselves at a crossroads, beginning with law handed down by the Supreme Court that do not consider women smart or worthy enough to make her own reproductive health care choices. Here in Texas, ground zero for stripping a woman of their rights, your pregnancy is essentially owned by the state.
Change takes all of our voices, soft and loud, small and large. It’s less about what our philosophies and beliefs are, and more about how we behave in the world. Prajna, thank you for the invitation; for holding up a mirror; for singing your own “I am woman, here me roar” song. Remember this dear sisters, “they” can make laws to undercut our equality; they can laud Trad Wives (lost souls that they are); they can rail against single cat-women; BUT THEY CAN NEVER TAKE OUR MIND, OUR HEART OR OUR INTENTION.
May we all live life in a way that supports our fellow sisters. May we all support, uplift and bless one another on our journey into a society that has the potential to be balanced by feminine and masculine without any tethers of ownership. May we behave in ways that lets the world know: I am strong. I am invincible. I am woman.
Wow, thank you so so much. I really appreciate the depth of your comment. You include so many important details that some of us might think already attended to or don’t really matter because they’re not impacting us directly etc. you say it loud and clear. Date rape… I imagine there are many women still in recovery from that and never said a word because it was so minimized or part of the program.
Yes, so many things that can be taken and how important it is to remember what cannot be taken . It is for us to stand together so we can do well by all of our sisters.
You are awesome. Thank you for serving your sisterhood and all the invisible invisible ways.
I am so glad. I had no idea that this essay would receive such a wonderful reception. It makes all the fun energy that went into it worth it and there’s more to come. Women are amazing.
Hi Andy, Yes. I didn’t know all that about Tori Amos. I’ve always loved her music, but I didn’t recognize the connection to her life amazing and majestic. Thank you for reading and commenting and sharing your experience.
Prajna, your reflections feel like an honest, layered conversation about reclaiming ourselves. I hear in your words the edges of pain, wisdom, and strength—how they all coexist without needing to be resolved into something simpler.
For me, being human has never been about fitting neatly into a predefined image. And yet, I also need to acknowledge my relationship with gender: born into a female body, living 53 years partially socialized as female, but never feeling entirely at home in that identity. I’ve always known I wasn’t male, either, so transitioning from one binary to another wasn’t the answer. Instead, I find myself in the in-between spaces—partially socialized female, partially male, and often sitting between all the chairs, never finding one to truly claim as mine.
That liminal space isn’t just something I experienced in the past—it’s where I still live, not as a choice but as the truth of who I am. It’s not isolating because it once was; it is isolating, though not without its depth and meaning. It’s where I’ve had to learn to create my own seat, my own space, my own way of being, even when it feels like the world doesn’t quite know what to make of that.
When I think about direction and identity, I find it fascinating how music holds such resonance. For me, two songs that have stayed with me since the 1980s are “I Am What I Am” and “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor—both powerful anthems of self-definition and resilience. And interestingly, when I’m deeply searching for direction in my life, I find myself drawn to “Take Me Home, Country Roads” by John Denver. There’s something about that song—its yearning, its simplicity—that feels like a compass pointing me toward something true, even when the path isn’t clear.
What you’ve shared isn’t just a critique of old systems; it’s a call to step into the fullness of ourselves. The way you weave memory, music, and myth into something that doesn’t demand resolution but instead invites exploration speaks to me. It reminds me that the in-between, while challenging, holds its own kind of power and beauty.
Thank you for holding space for these questions—they’re not easy, but they matter. Let’s keep sitting with them.
Hello Jay, I love reading your words—you are deep and thoughtful. I relate to this "That liminal space isn’t just something I experienced in the past—it’s where I still live, not as a choice but as the truth of who I am." and "I will survive" is high on my list!
I would love to sit and chat with you.
I do not identify as male or female—I am more like a tree. My daughter, who is lesbian, the other non-binary—the other without words to tell us—they wonder about me as I feel passion, erotic, in my body and happy with living in the liminal spaces—this is my natural way. I've trained with indigenous people who also do not claim one or the other. My daughter bought me a book on asexuality—not that either. I do wonder if identity is a conditioned societal construct that we hang our pants or skirts on. And my lived experience is that of a woman recovering from patriarchy — not a hatred toward men, not a fan of bad behavior by anyone—injustice, dominance, all of that. It's fun to center the voices and experiences of women who have the lived experience of femaleness in a patriarchal culture—including someone like me who felt riddled with shame at one point by my gender and how we were treated. I can speak to this, I have no idea where it goes and do not hold a position, as you said, I love to explore, research, listen, feel, and lift the layers of my own confusion or confinement so I can celebrate this one precious life. Thank you for a beautiful comment — yes let's sit and roar from the deepest resource within.
After reading this, I can’t help but imagine what a "fireside" chat might look like—both sides of the Atlantic, sitting in the liminal space, unpacking gender, patriarchy, history, intersectionality, sexuality, societal conditioning, and how it all lives and breathes in us.
Your reflections, Prajna, bring a sense of a living, breathing conversation—honest, layered, and open-ended. The image of roaring together from the deepest resources within speaks to me. This isn’t about simplifying or reducing ourselves into tidy boxes but about honoring the complexity, the in-between, and the spaces where truth is unfiltered.
I’d love to extend that conversation someday—not just through text but virtually, in real time. There’s something powerful about exploring together, allowing our stories and insights to weave into something meaningful. Let’s make that fireside roar a reality. 🦁
Hi Jodi, I will be curious about what you will find. She has a riveting backstory, voice and unlimited creativity. I love her. Check out "Orange Knickers under my petticoat" I think that is the title. Enjoy and thx for reading.
This is beautifully written Prajna! Oh, that poem by Sojourner Truth sends chills up and down my spine every time I hear it. In this case read it! "Ain't I a woman!" yes "I am woman and hear me roar!"
Hey Julie, Thank you so much for your roar and friendship — yes — there are so many amazing women. I love how women have sorted life out through music and poetry and words and roars and witchery and ... you name it, we're a force.
Thank you for this post and sharing some of the important words of the woman who have dared to express about oppression and life in a patriarchal world where men still and make up the rules. The rise of the divine feminine is happening but it will take time. I too am born in the late 50’s and am not convinced that I will see much change in my lifetime but I hope that my granddaughter who’s 10 now will.
Hi Heather, Thank you so much for this. We've seen so much and we can only wonder what will stick. Like Helen said, "I'm still an embryo..." And we have to see how far we have come when we can. Due to patriarchal fuckery I don't see grandchildren coming but I would love to have eyes on the future generation. I am glad you are here, chiming in and sharing the wisdom of your lived experiences. Sending you hug.
Brilliant, Prajna! ✨️ I so enjoyed this piece. A few specifics... Like you, I loved that documentary on Helen Reddy. I also share your passion for the music of Tori Amos. A few weeks ago, my 34-year-old daughter revealed to me that she does, too. And she admitted she essentially stole my Boys for Pele CD. Which made me smile. It's amazing how basic and obvious the inequities have been between the sexes. In a former life, having taught at a girls-only prep school for twenty years, I'm familiar with the work of Carol Gilligan. I will always be a feminist, Prajna. That word remains in my job description! Great article and keep going with these.
Hi this means a lot coming from you as a feminist. I am in good company isn’t Tori Amos amazing and of course Helen Reddy she only died recently. I imagine Tori is about our age.
Girls only prep.
I was in Gilligans lecture and everything she was speaking about had not landed yet
Revisiting many themes under the same Thank you again
Yes, given her circumstances, she was an incredibly strong woman and role model for the time. I was always cheering her on her little sidekick or a partner in crime however, you want to look at it thank you.
Helen Reddy forever!
Oh yes! Thank you. Did you see the documentary—what a life!
Sojourner Truth is such a woman!
Yes, the best of all time, I bow to Sojouner Truth again and again.
Me too!
I wrote this poem today and I think you’ll appreciate it. It is in response to @Peter d'Errico ‘s piece on thinking like a lawyer. Curious your theology background - is it more Vedic or Christian/Catholic or other? I was born in a Sufi commune, moved to the greater Boston area to train for skating (briefly stopped by Connecticut where my mother saved me from someone who tried to groom me who later settled with several other skaters, then went to an anabaptist college, married my youth sponsor from an evangelical free church who was scary messed up, heard God speak for the first time telling me to move back to Boston, which I had said I would do over my dead body kicking and screaming, and met my current husband in the church I felt guided to while seven months pregnant with my oldest daughter. My now husband and I got kicked off the worship team, but I still did some time in seminary before realizing it was pretty dead in there.
The silliness of law
Is that it just depends
On which paw
You place on which
Jot or tittle
Of if you use your paws to prance around
A little
If a dog picked up little pieces of paper
That represented which precedents would become vapor
Or chose which Supreme Court Cases to take
Rather than avoiding those with a certain high stake
That could undermine the
Power of the Dominator
To take
Well if a dog used his smell
To find what stinks
And to bring justice back from the brink
We just might find a different story
Whether or about rights of protestors
Or truly horrible finks
Who do fathomless atrocities beyond what the mind can absorb, what it thinks
If law is the use of words to bind and to free
It is witchcraft
Of words
Where the meaning can be paddled around eddys
To peddle the raft
Using wizardry so daft
Intellectually dry
You couldn’t even think it was witchcraft
That made the heart of justice cry
While babies die
And the elite get high
But the Supreme Court won’t touch
Those who’ve touched
To film
While death goes by
And silly little law
Weighs letters
Or conveys meaning
Bought with the lives of those sacrificed
By those those who do the convening
Untoward
- poetry in response to your piece
Awww Alicia, this is so good. I need to take it in and come back and respond when I can absorb. The words are powerful. I’m gonna come back to this. Thank you so much. Hello.🌹❤️🐉
<3 Thank you for taking the time to be with my poem. It fills me with a sense of connection and joy.
Alicia, yes, all of my formal education was untoward anything I thought it would be. But I guess I needed to do that to find that out.
both Christian theology, mostly mysticism found very enriching and then Advaita mixed up in the world of male sages with many women holding them up.
Don’t get me going. My children’s father one of them., need I say they are without fathering As the Vedic expression is of the opinion that you do not exist. The world is Brahman, Brahman alone is real…
Your words speak to me
Thank you.
My heart goes out to you so big...I wish you had had the fathering for your lovelies that they/you are so worthy to have had.
Ooooo - I would love to hear more about the Christian mysticism you have found resonant! That sucks about the gurus. And the misuse of non dualism. What the f, right? I have a copy of Yeshe Tsogyal's terma autobiography and in it Padma clearly considers her an equal. I once went on a medicine buddha retreat that actually was given by a woman who claims enlightenment in the Tibetan tradition who switched bodies using a secret scroll because she/formerly he didn't agree with the sexism in Buddhism. I asked one of the nuns why Green Tara wasn't bigger compared to Shakyamuni Buddha and she told me, "Well it is buddhism." I said, "Yeah, but it's not Shakyamuni-ism." I get weird awkward silence! In the Yeshe Tsogyal autobiography Padma says someday tantra/secret mantra will get abused and become unhelpful. The woman guru (not my guru) said she wasn't sure if sexuality was more helpful or unhelpful at this point because so many people have trauma. I stay away from gurus, generally, and new age communities but I have a bit of a nose for bad gurus and it is my strong tendency to call them out. In fact one of my New Year's resolutions this year is to stop bopping people over the head every time they post a quote a by someone famous I know to have a dark side that is carried (and I believe transmitted) informationally within their appealing quote, unless I am truly led to do so.
Thank you for this very necessary and dear reminder of who we are and who we can choose to be under our own power. I don’t need to be a woman in a man’s world. I can embrace being a woman in my own world. With all the fierce love and endless curiosity this vessel will hold. Appreciate the beauty and power of your writing so much. ❤️
Awww, yes yes yes, I love the strength and your response to this essay. I feel empowered by your words and appreciate you so much. The old man’s world is crumbling as it needs to. I love finding the stories of women. Thanks for commenting.
😘
Reading while awake in the night, UK time. This really resonates on a deep level, Prajna, thank you.
You’ve reminded me I love Tori Amos - ages since I listened, though, and I will be playing her music in the morning.
I’ll watch the Helen Reddy documentary - thank you for the tip.
Thank you, Wendy, I heard an interview with Tori Amos recently, which got me to listen more to her music. It’s been years. My daughters used to always tease me about singing her songs “the color of orange knickers under your Petty coat…”
I’m curious as to what you will think about the documentary, I am woman. It was an eye-opener for me of course it doesn’t cover all of her life but very interesting to see the challenges she traversed.
Thank you for reading.
I feel the strength in this piece, Prajna. I look back at my life some days and I see myself crawling back to my true self.
Hello Shelley, thank you so much for reading and commenting. I feel like I received strength in writing this. There is so much that women have done. I went down a rabbit hole and I could’ve written an entire book and then some.
I know the crawling feeling. I’m so glad you’re here.
Thank you for your warmth giving me a sense of belonging. It’s needed right now. 💙
Awwweee Shelley, of course. I understand that feeling as well.
I send you love and care, a big hug
Hi Prajna, I really enjoyed your powerful words. I am currently working through Murdock's The Heroine's Journey", it's excellent. Sending love and power to you x
Hello RG, I love Murdoch book. She doesn’t excellent job clarifying so many things about women spirituality.
If you write something about it, please be sure to tag me. I would love to read it.
Thank you for your comment.
🌹
A truly magnificent and important post. (Also I received a little nudge from the universe with a few synchronicities I’ve had lately with Tori Amos, someone I haven’t thought about in years.) I loved hearing your mom’s story most of all. But thank you for this beautiful tribute to Helen Reddy. I have to go watch that documentary now! I do think the idea of woman is evolving and thank Goddess for that. We have a long way to go. Essays like this give us the hope we need to press on. An extraordinary gift.
Hey Lyn’s, I love synchronicities.
I didn’t know all of those things about Tori Amos. We are listening to one of our songs in the kitchen and I decided to do some more research. I didn’t even know she was part Cherokee then I remembered you with her not that long ago. I learned all kinds of things she’s epic.
My mother was a true inspiration for her time and situation, without a doubt. Thank you for recognizing that part of the essay.
And Helen Reddy seems like she was born ready.
Thanks so much for liking and sharing and commenting. I appreciate you.
🌹
In 1973, I came of age. Roe Vs Wade was now considered “settled law,” but not really law, more like a ruling by which the country would abide. Why it was never codified as law is what got us here today. In 1974, I was “allowed” to get my first credit card. Up until that time, women had to have the signature of a husband or male relative in order to get credit of any kind. In the mid-seventies, it became illegal for a landlord to discriminate against a woman raising a child on her own, by refusing to rent to them. The seventies were a heady time for women, who in entering the work-force in increasing numbers, breathed in a notion of independence, and identity not formed or informed by men. Still, in the 1970’s the phrase “date rape” had not yet entered the lexicon, and women were often abused in this way without much recourse. Always lurking in the shadows has been a dark mysogeny meant to hurt, harm and keep women down. Helen Reddy, heroine that she is, brought awareness to the struggle to be seen as a free and sovereign soul, but the progress of such has never been completely transformative to our gender as a whole.
Again, we find ourselves at a crossroads, beginning with law handed down by the Supreme Court that do not consider women smart or worthy enough to make her own reproductive health care choices. Here in Texas, ground zero for stripping a woman of their rights, your pregnancy is essentially owned by the state.
Change takes all of our voices, soft and loud, small and large. It’s less about what our philosophies and beliefs are, and more about how we behave in the world. Prajna, thank you for the invitation; for holding up a mirror; for singing your own “I am woman, here me roar” song. Remember this dear sisters, “they” can make laws to undercut our equality; they can laud Trad Wives (lost souls that they are); they can rail against single cat-women; BUT THEY CAN NEVER TAKE OUR MIND, OUR HEART OR OUR INTENTION.
May we all live life in a way that supports our fellow sisters. May we all support, uplift and bless one another on our journey into a society that has the potential to be balanced by feminine and masculine without any tethers of ownership. May we behave in ways that lets the world know: I am strong. I am invincible. I am woman.
Hello Stephanie,
Wow, thank you so so much. I really appreciate the depth of your comment. You include so many important details that some of us might think already attended to or don’t really matter because they’re not impacting us directly etc. you say it loud and clear. Date rape… I imagine there are many women still in recovery from that and never said a word because it was so minimized or part of the program.
Yes, so many things that can be taken and how important it is to remember what cannot be taken . It is for us to stand together so we can do well by all of our sisters.
You are awesome. Thank you for serving your sisterhood and all the invisible invisible ways.
💚🌹💚💪🏽🔥💪🏽
You brought forth my mama bear spirit animal this morning! Biggest hugs, my sister.
I am so glad. I had no idea that this essay would receive such a wonderful reception. It makes all the fun energy that went into it worth it and there’s more to come. Women are amazing.
I've just gone down the biggest Tori Amos rabbit hole and it has been majestic! Thank you x
Hi Andy, Yes. I didn’t know all that about Tori Amos. I’ve always loved her music, but I didn’t recognize the connection to her life amazing and majestic. Thank you for reading and commenting and sharing your experience.
Prajna, your reflections feel like an honest, layered conversation about reclaiming ourselves. I hear in your words the edges of pain, wisdom, and strength—how they all coexist without needing to be resolved into something simpler.
For me, being human has never been about fitting neatly into a predefined image. And yet, I also need to acknowledge my relationship with gender: born into a female body, living 53 years partially socialized as female, but never feeling entirely at home in that identity. I’ve always known I wasn’t male, either, so transitioning from one binary to another wasn’t the answer. Instead, I find myself in the in-between spaces—partially socialized female, partially male, and often sitting between all the chairs, never finding one to truly claim as mine.
That liminal space isn’t just something I experienced in the past—it’s where I still live, not as a choice but as the truth of who I am. It’s not isolating because it once was; it is isolating, though not without its depth and meaning. It’s where I’ve had to learn to create my own seat, my own space, my own way of being, even when it feels like the world doesn’t quite know what to make of that.
When I think about direction and identity, I find it fascinating how music holds such resonance. For me, two songs that have stayed with me since the 1980s are “I Am What I Am” and “I Will Survive” by Gloria Gaynor—both powerful anthems of self-definition and resilience. And interestingly, when I’m deeply searching for direction in my life, I find myself drawn to “Take Me Home, Country Roads” by John Denver. There’s something about that song—its yearning, its simplicity—that feels like a compass pointing me toward something true, even when the path isn’t clear.
What you’ve shared isn’t just a critique of old systems; it’s a call to step into the fullness of ourselves. The way you weave memory, music, and myth into something that doesn’t demand resolution but instead invites exploration speaks to me. It reminds me that the in-between, while challenging, holds its own kind of power and beauty.
Thank you for holding space for these questions—they’re not easy, but they matter. Let’s keep sitting with them.
Hello Jay, I love reading your words—you are deep and thoughtful. I relate to this "That liminal space isn’t just something I experienced in the past—it’s where I still live, not as a choice but as the truth of who I am." and "I will survive" is high on my list!
I would love to sit and chat with you.
I do not identify as male or female—I am more like a tree. My daughter, who is lesbian, the other non-binary—the other without words to tell us—they wonder about me as I feel passion, erotic, in my body and happy with living in the liminal spaces—this is my natural way. I've trained with indigenous people who also do not claim one or the other. My daughter bought me a book on asexuality—not that either. I do wonder if identity is a conditioned societal construct that we hang our pants or skirts on. And my lived experience is that of a woman recovering from patriarchy — not a hatred toward men, not a fan of bad behavior by anyone—injustice, dominance, all of that. It's fun to center the voices and experiences of women who have the lived experience of femaleness in a patriarchal culture—including someone like me who felt riddled with shame at one point by my gender and how we were treated. I can speak to this, I have no idea where it goes and do not hold a position, as you said, I love to explore, research, listen, feel, and lift the layers of my own confusion or confinement so I can celebrate this one precious life. Thank you for a beautiful comment — yes let's sit and roar from the deepest resource within.
After reading this, I can’t help but imagine what a "fireside" chat might look like—both sides of the Atlantic, sitting in the liminal space, unpacking gender, patriarchy, history, intersectionality, sexuality, societal conditioning, and how it all lives and breathes in us.
Your reflections, Prajna, bring a sense of a living, breathing conversation—honest, layered, and open-ended. The image of roaring together from the deepest resources within speaks to me. This isn’t about simplifying or reducing ourselves into tidy boxes but about honoring the complexity, the in-between, and the spaces where truth is unfiltered.
I’d love to extend that conversation someday—not just through text but virtually, in real time. There’s something powerful about exploring together, allowing our stories and insights to weave into something meaningful. Let’s make that fireside roar a reality. 🦁
Looks great. Saving to read soon! ✨️
Looking forward to your comment. Thank you, Robin.
I’m completely ignorant of all things Tori Amos outside of knowing she exists. I’m going to spend some time this week listening. ❤️
Hi Jodi, I will be curious about what you will find. She has a riveting backstory, voice and unlimited creativity. I love her. Check out "Orange Knickers under my petticoat" I think that is the title. Enjoy and thx for reading.
This is beautifully written Prajna! Oh, that poem by Sojourner Truth sends chills up and down my spine every time I hear it. In this case read it! "Ain't I a woman!" yes "I am woman and hear me roar!"
Hey Julie, Thank you so much for your roar and friendship — yes — there are so many amazing women. I love how women have sorted life out through music and poetry and words and roars and witchery and ... you name it, we're a force.
Thank you for this post and sharing some of the important words of the woman who have dared to express about oppression and life in a patriarchal world where men still and make up the rules. The rise of the divine feminine is happening but it will take time. I too am born in the late 50’s and am not convinced that I will see much change in my lifetime but I hope that my granddaughter who’s 10 now will.
Hi Heather, Thank you so much for this. We've seen so much and we can only wonder what will stick. Like Helen said, "I'm still an embryo..." And we have to see how far we have come when we can. Due to patriarchal fuckery I don't see grandchildren coming but I would love to have eyes on the future generation. I am glad you are here, chiming in and sharing the wisdom of your lived experiences. Sending you hug.
Brilliant, Prajna! ✨️ I so enjoyed this piece. A few specifics... Like you, I loved that documentary on Helen Reddy. I also share your passion for the music of Tori Amos. A few weeks ago, my 34-year-old daughter revealed to me that she does, too. And she admitted she essentially stole my Boys for Pele CD. Which made me smile. It's amazing how basic and obvious the inequities have been between the sexes. In a former life, having taught at a girls-only prep school for twenty years, I'm familiar with the work of Carol Gilligan. I will always be a feminist, Prajna. That word remains in my job description! Great article and keep going with these.
Hi this means a lot coming from you as a feminist. I am in good company isn’t Tori Amos amazing and of course Helen Reddy she only died recently. I imagine Tori is about our age.
Girls only prep.
I was in Gilligans lecture and everything she was speaking about had not landed yet
Revisiting many themes under the same Thank you again
P.S. Your mom. What a strong lady and a role model.
Yes, given her circumstances, she was an incredibly strong woman and role model for the time. I was always cheering her on her little sidekick or a partner in crime however, you want to look at it thank you.